Glossary

The following is a list of words I have, at various times, been asked to define. Many of them are just scraps of British slang, but a few are genuinely obscure, or completely imaginary. If there's a word in my journal which you don't know, let me know about it and I'll add it to the list.

A bit thick: Suspicious, implausible: "She told me the Super Valu was cheaper than Urban Fare, but that sounded a bit thick to me."
Ages: A really long time: "I haven't been to London in ages."
Arse: Bottom (ass).
Bag, old: An irksome old lady.
Bairdie Paddo: Literally, "bearded frog or toad". I don't think such a thing exists, or has ever existed. However, if you say something's "gone the way of the bairdie paddo", what you're really saying is that it doesn't exist any more: "Yeah, big hair and blue eyeshadow have totally gone the way of the bairdie paddo." Only hosers say things like this.
Barmy: Insane, addled: "Get out of my house, you barmy sod!
Berk: An irritating or unpleasant person, or an idiot. When you call someone a berk, you're really calling them, er, something that rhymes with Berkeley Hunt.
Bin (noun): Garbage can.
Bin (verb): To consign to the garbage can.
Blether (verb): To talk, generally at length, possibly without saying much of consequence.
Blether (noun): A person who talks at length without saying much of consequence.
Blimey: Short form of "gorblimey"--exclamation of surprise, delight, anger, irritation, shock, confusion, or just about anything one might exclaim over.
Boak: To vomit.
Boaky: Nauseous.
Boot (noun): The bit in a car where you stick your spare tire and so forth.
Boot (verb): To vomit.
Boot, old: See bag, old, above.
Bother: An exclamation of annoyance or disgust.
Bothered: Worried.
Bottom: See arse, above.
Bugger: To sodomize, arse-wise.
Bugger off: Go away, with prejudice: "You suck! Bugger off!
Bum: A beggar or vagrant OR see arse, above.
Buzzer: A device installed in a building, which enables people downstairs to ask people upstairs to let them in.
Buzzing someone in: Using the buzzer (above) to let someone into a building.
Chintzy: Cheap, insufficient, stingy, or substandard: "They were really chintzy with the bags at the Statoil." / "That's one chintzy old coat."
Chips: Fried strips of potato, often served with fish.
Common: Lower-class: "When you talk like that, you sound dead common."
Crisps: Potato chips.
Cunt: Female genitalia, or a person of either gender.
Cuntyballs: A mildly irksome person, generally male, OR an effeminate man.
Doss cunt: A lazy, useless person.
Dosser: A lazy person or bum.
Dust: Garbage, trash, refuse.
Dustbin: Receptacle for dust (garbage can)
Dustmen: People who pick up your dust.
Emetophobia: The fear of vomit or vomiting.
Faugh: An exclamation of disgust.
Flat: An apartment.
Get Knotted: Get fucked. Variant: get stuffed.
Get the boak: To become nauseous.
Git: An irritating or unpleasant person.
Gorblimey: Contraction of "God blind me!"--see Blimey, above.
Got Whiskers On: Old (as in an old joke, or food that's old enough to be somewhat dodgy): "Why did the chicken cross the road?" "Dude, that one's got whiskers on!".
Grouse: To complain.
Harridan: See bag, old, above.
Hooer: Whore.
Horse: An ugly quadruped, OR heroin.
Horse, a load of: A lie or tall tale.
Hoser: I think it's the Canadian word for "loser". That's how I use it, anyhow.
Idiodyssey (not a real word): An idiotic odyssey.
Keks: Underpants. I'm not sure I've ever used this word in my journal--it's a bit common for my tastes--but, yeah, it means underpants.
Knickers: Underpants.
Knockers: Breasts.
Loo: Toilets: "Pardon me. I must visit the loo.
Loo roll: Toilet paper.
Mank: One who is manky (see below).
Manky: Disgusting, dirty, or gross: "After a week without washing, the bath towel was completely manky.
Meatspace: The real world (not the Internet, that is): "I usually talk to Jack on ICQ, but today we got together in meatspace for some coffee and cake.
Meiji period: 1868-1912 (the reign of Emperor Meiji).
Naff: Gauche or tacky: "Man, those shoes he had on were completely naff.
Nards: Testicles.
Owl: A carnivorous bird.
Packbawky: A bird, especially of the noisy sort that can be found in large flocks (seagulls and pigeons are good examples of this type of bird.)
Pack in: To ditch, break up with, or dump (one's boy/girlfriend.)
Pants: Poor or substandard: "I'm completely pants at skating."
Peckish: Hungry.
Plonker: A condom.
Poofy Cling: I have no idea what this originally meant. There's a bizarre story behind it, in fact: I had an absolutely antiquated O-level English textbook at one time, and on the inner cover, someone had written "Peter S. is a poofy cling." I use the phrase to mean "any unruly or untidy pile of matter, eg. messy hair, a pile of shredded paper". It was probably originally intended as a slur on the sexual preference of Peter S., however.
Piss: To urinate.
Piss off: To annoy, OR see bugger off, above.
Randy: Horny, sexually aroused.
Rat: A small rodent--generally refers to either Rattus rattus, the black, ship, or roof rat, or to Rattus norvegicus, the brown or Norway rat.
Roger: To fuck (male): "I rogered Jane last night." / "I got rogered by John last night."
Rotter: An unpleasant person.
Rubbish (noun): Garbage, trash, refuse.
Rubbish (adjective): See pants, above.
Rubbish (verb): To enthusiastically deride something or someone: "I always rubbish Steve, because he's a twat."
Rubbished: Run-down, tatty: "I was completely rubbished after a night without sleep." / "The building was completely rubbished after the breakin."
Sarnie: A sandwich.
Skelly (noun): A skeleton.
Skelly (adjective): Very thin, resembling a skeleton: "You're looking awfully skelly these days.
Skyve or Skive: To skip out on one's obligations (skipping class, for example.)
Skyvey: Irresponsible, confused, or scattered.
Scotneys: Annoying Scottish people who use Cockney rhyming slang all the time.
Scraggy or Scraggly: Messy, unkempt.
Scrog: To fuck. See roger, above.
Shag: To fuck.
Shite: Shit, excrement, rubbish: "The dog did a shite on the floor." / "Get all this shite off my desk!"
Socar Myles: Me.
Sod: An unpleasant person, derived from "sodomite".
Sod off: Go away. See bugger off, above.
Tatty: Run-down, in poor repair.
Thick): Stupid.
Twat: Female genitalia, or a person of either gender (probably an irritating sort of a person--see git, above.
Twit: A ninny or fool.
Vendetta: A blood-feud.
Wally: A silly-billy.
Wank: To masturbate.
Wanker: A person who masturbates.
Wee: Small, diminutive: "That is an ugly wee rat."
Willy: A penis, OR someone who's a bit of a fool.